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The only decision possible

By Edie
Posted on

I had the conversation with my parent.

As a family we frequently talked about what we wanted at the end of life. It was never a sad or depressing conversation. I was very thankful that we had those conversations because it made the decision to stop treatment and provide pain relief the only decision possible.
 My Mother was 86 when she went to the hospital to have elective hip replacement surgery.  Her post-operative course did not go liked we hoped it would.  For 2 days I sat with her knowing that something was wrong. I was there on my own to make decisions.

I am a health care professional, but that hardly matters when the patient is your family.  She finally got to the ICU.  When the MD came out to talk to me I knew the prognosis was not good.There were options, but none of them good. As hard as it was to know that your loved one is not going to survive, it was not hard to make the decision to stop doing heroic things.

My Mother had written her Advanced Directive years ago.  As a family we frequently talked about what we wanted at the end of life.  It was never a sad or depressing conversation. I was very thankful that we had those conversations because it made the decision to stop treatment and provide pain relief the only decision possible.  While my sister never made it to the hospital that evening, a few friends were able to get there.

We were able to sit with my Mom the last few hours of her life, hold her hand, and talk to her.  It went quick and hopefully she did not suffer.I can’t imagine not knowing your loved ones thoughts about the end of life.

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