Death & dying are always subjects that make people cringe or walk away from or change the subject of. They are also necessary.

We all (even if we don’t admit it) think about what we want “when the time comes”. We know what we want for ourselves. We know what we want to happen or not happen, when it is in our control.

I have had “the conversation” with my immediate family (husband, daughter, daughter), but have not yet had it with my father (who will be 80 yrs old in April) or my siblings/nieces/nephews. I don’t feel like it was a difficult conversation to have with my immediates. I do have mixed feelings about having it with my dad & siblings.

I think in this case, it is more “real” maybe, because of my father’s age. I’m not really ready to go through his death, but I also know without a doubt that I will have so much guilt when the time comes, if I don’t know what he would have wanted. I’m planning to discuss this during our Thanksgiving Holiday. This is about the only time we are all in the same room at the same time.

I want him to know that I will carry out what HE wants. I’m hoping it will give a chance to others as well, to discuss what they would want for end-of-life care.

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