Here's your portable guide to the conversation.
Download and print your Starter Kit PDF
NEW! You can now type your answers directly into the Starter Kit, save your personalized version, finish or change it later, and email it to family and friends.

Also available in Spanish
Descargar e imprimir el Starter Kit en español
Now that you've had the conversation with your loved ones, are you ready to talk with your doctor?
Download and print the How to Talk to Your Doctor PDF
Also available in Spanish
Descargar e imprimir el How to Talk to Your Doctor en español

Step 2: Get Set

Now, think about what you want for end-of-life care by using the tools on this page.

You’ll see that this isn’t really about dying—it’s about figuring out how you want to live, till the very end.

“What matters to me is _____.”

Think about the things that are most important to you. What do you value most? What can you not imagine living without?

Now finish this sentence: “What matters to me at the end of my life is _____.”

Sharing your “What matters to me” statement with your loved ones could be a big help down the road. It could help them communicate to your doctor what abilities are most important to you—what’s worth pursuing treatment for, and what isn’t.

Here are a few statements to get you thinking:

Mom with kids“What matters to me is being able to recognize my kids.”

Older gentleman“What matters to me is being able to eat chocolate ice cream and watch football on TV.”

Where I Stand scales

Ready to dig deeper? Use the scales below to figure out how you want your end-of-life care to be.

Think about which number best represents your feelings on the given scenario.

As a patient…

1 2 3 4 5
I want my doctors to do what they think is best I want to have a say in every decision
1 2 3 4 5
I’m worried that I won’t get enough care I’m worried that I’ll get overly aggressive care

How long do you want to receive medical care?

1 2 3 4 5
I want to live as long as possible, no matter what Quality of life is more important to me than quantity
1 2 3 4 5
I wouldn’t mind being cared for in a nursing facility if necessary I want to live independently, no matter what

How involved do you want your loved ones to be?

1 2 3 4 5
I want my loved ones to do exactly what I’ve said, even if it makes them a little uncomfortable I want my loved ones to do what brings them peace, even if it goes against what I’ve said

You can find more scales in the “Get Set” section of your Starter Kit PDF.

PLEASE NOTE: This document does not seek to provide legal advice.

Do you have a good idea about what your wishes are? It’s time to plan for and have the conversation.

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